We decided to take some of what, we at least, considered to be our best information and advice on getting started in the Lifestyle and put it in an easy to read e-book. This is not intended to be a recruiting guide. The first half talks about how to get involved. The second half is designed to help the newbie sidestep some of the common landmines all couples must learn to recognize if they are going to be successful in Swinging. Here are a few excerpts:
Let me be clear about one thing. I am not an expert in relationships. I do not claim to have all the answers, or even the right ones. What I do have however, is experience in the Lifestyle and based on that experience I will tell you this….swinging can and will destroy your marriage if you go into it with false pretenses or unrealistic expectations. Swinging in real life does not look anything like late night cable. Swinging can open a Pandora’s Box of jealousy, insecurities, pettiness and selfishness that few couples can survive intact. The opposite is also true. When approached correctly, the Lifestyle can be one of the most exciting, titillating experiences a couple can share. Swingers that are successful in the Lifestyle are some of the best communicating, most honest, committed couples you will ever encounter. ” Continue reading
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Sorry…I’m only allowed to look.
Every once in awhile we receive an email from a visitor asking our opinion on what is and is not okay for a couple in the Lifestyle to be doing. While we certainly are always willing to help, these are particularly difficult questions to give advice on. The following is an email we received recently and our response.
My husband and I have been entertaining the swing scene for about a year. Every time we meet an interesting couple, whether or not we bed them, my husband likes to develop a “textual” relationship with the other woman. Sharing detailed fantasies and pictures. I’m not completely innocent as I have one man (from the initial couple we played with) that I still text (my husband knows and does text the other woman sometimes). Occasionally sending a naughty pic. However, its nothing like what my husband wants to continue to do with many other women. Honestly, I don’t have the interest or time. Do you see any potential problems that could arise with him continuing this? Or is this normal behavior among swingers? I just don’t know what other people are doing. Continue reading
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So at a party recently, after many a beverage was consumed, someone I’m talking to points toward another couple and said, “I think they’re swingers”. I looked at them and asked why they thought that. They shrugged and evaded a real answer. They danced around a word or two and then the conversation changed to a different topic. I later asked the person pointed to if they were swingers as someone claimed they were. Maybe I was just pushing an envelope or testing boundaries….but I was also curious to know the answer. As many more of a beverage had been consumed at that point, she just smiled, giggled and said, “I don’t know” all coyly and bashful and trotted off. Continue reading
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